Fulfilling Her Mom’s Dying Wish
March 15, 2022
Here's What This Post Covers
Today we welcome Emily Johnson, who shares her beautiful story of the gift she received following the passing of her beloved mother.
The story behind Bird of Paradise, Emily’s first novel, is unique. Her mom began writing Bird of Paradise when she was diagnosed with advanced-stage cancer. She passed away in 2012, leaving the novel unfinished for Emily to complete.
The ability to delve into her mother’s written words was the gift of a lifetime and gave her the strength to overcome the grief she felt at the loss of her mother. She’d come to realize it to be a roadmap from her mom to guide her through life.
This is a story that will touch your heart, so be sure to tune in.
Here are three reasons why you should listen to the complete Episode:
- Emily opens up about the ultimate gift from her mom, a letter, and a copy of her unfinished manuscript.
- Learn about the journey of how Emily’s mom outlived the doctor’s initial prognosis by over a decade.
- Discover her eight-year journey of fulfilling her mom’s last wish.
Episode Highlights
Who is Emily Johnson
- Emily was born in Aspen, Colorado, where she grew up skiing, playing golf, and dancing ballet.
- She attended UNC-Chapel Hill and graduated with a degree in Journalism and Mass Communications, concentrating in Public Relations.
- Today she works with companies and individuals, providing marketing, consulting, and writing services.
- Emily currently resides in Raleigh, North Carolina, with her husband and son and enjoys playing golf, writing, kickboxing, hiking, and spending time with her family.
The big “C”
- At the tender age of 13, Emily’s world changed.
- Her mom was diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of 43.
- The breast cancer was caught early, thanks to her mom’s regular self-examinations.
- After having the tumor removed and going through radiation, life seemed to go back to normal for them as a family.
Ovarian cancer, the silent killer
- When Emily was 15, they got bad news, and her mom had been diagnosed with advanced-stage ovarian cancer, often referred to as the silent killer.
- The doctors said to her mom that statistically, this is not something she’s going to survive.
- They gave her one to two years and told her to get her affairs in order.
- Emily had to face the reality that her mom may not make it to her high school graduation.
Strength and willpower
- Emily admits that her mom was as stubborn as a mule.
- She would not accept the statistics and was determined to see her daughter walk down the aisle, nothing less.
- Emily’s mom found a group of doctors willing to look at her as an individual versus a statistic.
- Over a year, she underwent about eight surgeries and lots of chemotherapy.
Emily’s milestones
- Just when things would get better, her mom would get diagnosed with ovarian cancer again.
- Because of her mom’s fighting spirit, she was there to witness Emily’s milestones, such as her high school graduation, college graduation and wedding.
- Emily’s mom had fulfilled her dream of seeing her daughter walk down the aisle, outliving the doctor’s initial prognosis.
Her passing
- When Emily was 30, her mom suddenly fell ill, and it was not cancer.
- It was unknown for a while, but she had kidney failure and never made it home after taking her to the hospital.
- She had kidney failure from all the years of chemotherapy.
- In December of 2012, she was on life support and she passed away 17 years after her initial diagnosis.
She was always in control
- Emily’s mom never did anything unintentionally; going off life support was all self-will.
- She was always in control and made sure that Emily and her dad didn’t have to make the dreaded decision of taking her off life support; she made the decision.
- They’d never have to live wondering whether they had made the right decision.
Bird of Paradise
- After her mom’s initial ovarian cancer diagnosis, Emily’s mom began writing a book called Bird of Paradise.
- She spent years researching and writing, never letting anyone read it.
- Shortly after her passing, Emily found a letter from her mom and the unfinished manuscript.
- Her mom requested that she complete the book for her.
A roadmap to guide Emily
- Emily sat down and read the manuscript; it was just like continuing a conversation with her mom. She could hear her voice through the characters.
- It dawned on Emily that this was not her mom just taking time to write a book; this was her mom leaving her a gift, a roadmap to guide her through life.
- She didn’t know whether she’d be there to teach her these valuable life lessons, so she put it in the words of the story.
Her mom stopped writing
- There was a point when Emily’s mom stopped writing.
- Emily is unsure if it was because she was not feeling well, but she’d like to think it was intentional.
- She believes her mom knew that she’d need the rest of the story.
Freedom to complete the book
- The journey of fulfilling her mom’s wish was therapeutic, and it’s a conversation with her mom that will live on the pages forever.
- There were no notes or indications of where she wanted Emily to take the story.
- She had written all but one character; Emily just had the name and that character’s role in the story.
- Emily believes that she did this because she wanted to give her the freedom to take the story where she wanted to.
Writing style
- Emily’s writing style differed from that of her mothers, who were poetic and descriptive.
- She was a journalism major, so by style, Emily was very to the point, not descriptive at all and accustomed to providing facts.
- It was a massive challenge for Emily to make the book cohesive and honor her mom’s writing style, but she made sure she did.
- After eight years, she is proud that when she completed the book, no one could tell where her mom had left off, not even her publisher.
- She and her father are the only ones who know.
Emily’s most significant life lessons
- You cannot choose what happens to you in life, only how you respond to it.
- There are things in life that you cannot control, but you can take a negative situation and make it positive.
- Learning how to live as an independent woman and to never rely on someone else in life to give you your identity.
Part of the letter
- There’s a part of the letter that Emily includes in the book.
- She wanted to share it as part of her mom’s dedication.
- The extract is included in the below quotes.
Emily’s future in writing
- As a marketing and advertising freelancer, Emily is kept very busy.
- She also has a very active seven-year-old son.
- Emily has an idea of a story and is looking forward to beginning a second novel inspired by the characters of Bird of Paradise.
What Emily is grateful for
- Emily is grateful for her family; her husband, seven-year-old son, and her father are still healthy and a wonderful grandfather.
3 Powerful Quotes from this Episode
09:32 – “It’s amazing. And it was all self-will, I mean, she never did anything unintentionally, you know. And at the end, you know, it’s a very personal story. But we got to the point where my dad and I, you know, we knew we were going to have to make that decision about taking her off life support which you’re always gonna wonder, did I make the right decision and my mom somehow just took care of it herself. Right as they’re putting together that paperwork, she let herself pass. And my dad and I never had to wonder did we make the right decision. And so you know, even at that point on life support, she was still completely in control of what was going on. And to this day, ten years later, she is still in control”.
11:46 – “… it really all of a sudden dawns on me that this wasn’t my mom, just trying to, you know, take up time writing a book, this was my mom leaving me a gift, there are a lot of life lessons within the characters. And what happens? There are a lot of experiences my mom herself went through at various stages of her life that were kind of a roadmap to guide me through my life. And it was all things that she didn’t know, and she’d be here to teach me. So she put it into the words of the story”.
23:35 – “…I know now that this is where my story ends, so I hope you will begin where I left off. I will watch over you through the good times and the bad. I will be there with you to share the joys of becoming a mom, and I will be there watching as you and Matt grow old together. And each night, I will be there to whisper sweet dreams. I love you. Forever and Beyond, Mom”.
Connect with Emily Johnson
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Thanks for listening,
Tiff